Like everyone else, poker writers have New Year’s Resolutions. Considering the fact that a life dominated by sitting in front of a computer either writing or engaging in Omaha poker or holdem has left most of us with a physique any elephant seal would covet, cutting back on the carbs may be good vow. While the “resolution” status of my personal carbohydrate consumption is between me, my doctor, and any attractive woman who has heard me offer the “I’m built for comfort, not speed” argument fifteen minutes before the bar closes, I am happy to share my holdem related resolutions. I vow to stop listening to that inner voice that tells me call, when all logic and math demands I fold. I also vow to keep my wonderful and generous employers happy by using such SEO search words as “holdem MSN, poker players, holdem, and Omaha poker.” There is a list of other resolutions that I would love to hear a bunch of other poker players make as well. I will attach no names to these suggestions, but the offenders know who they are.
“Flash Poker” is a term that relates to playing the game online. There are people who need to stop taking these words literally and raising their shirt whenever they win a pot. Under no circumstances should a guy who can fill out a healthy C-cup be showing those to the rest of the table (or anyone else). Also, not everyone looks good naked, there are a lot of people who need to resolve to give up strip poker. Joanna Krupa is exempt from the previous resolution suggestion.
For those who run a game night, first of all, don’t let your mistress make brownies and ask the rest of us to tell your wife we brought them. Second, if the only songs you will program into your iPod are Manowar, the soundtrack from 300 and Harvey Danger, it is time to give up on music. Lastly, if some people don’t resolve to stop texting at the table, I resolve to send your high tech iPod a message with my low tech hammer.
That is it for the resolutions (with the exception of my resolution to make Bear McCreary the Grand Poobah of the Western Hemisphere), so Happy New Year! For the wonderful people who sign my paycheck “holdem MSN, poker players, holdem, and Omaha poker.” See, I use them!
